BLEACH THE REMAKE
by HimitsuAi18
Summary: Ichigo's a perv.................. The APOCALYPSE. Any way PAiring ICHIHIME remade the story to what i think could be entertaining dont know just felt like writing ICHIHIME ALL THE WAY! Summary in FIRST chap
1. My Life part 1

Hey this is Shan chan

My first bleach fic Yay …… this is gonna take a while awww man for some reason bleach is harder to write than Naruto. I can't let ma imagination run as much. By the way 'Naruto's True Feelings' im thinking of putting atleast one fight in there aw man now I have to read up on Nin justu, tai justu and gen justsu even do justu this sucks ass - crack ( warning this is a run on sentence) listening to Bleach ending 8 and I just felt like writing after that

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Rated M I guess pretty much for violence not sure if I should put romance in this fic ill decide l8r but the next story is a High school centre fic for Naruto and Bleach then maybe Chibi Vampire (Karin)

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Summary: Before Hueco Mundo arc way in the beginning. It's a remake of how Ichigo, Inoue, Ishida, Sado ( I like Chad better) and etc became friends. Also the characters personality is totally OC pretty much to some it all up ichigo is a PERVERT and he isn't hopeless of noticing others spiritual pressure, Inoue doesn't like him at first and chad is a leader in a gang and likes to hit people instead of taking his Abeulo's (how eva u spell it) advise u'll find out why. Ishida is the same Gay ass mutha fka and a total douche bag as always (still love him especially when he picks fights with Ichigo ……….. that's comdy ……… Japanese people are funny ………….. and ugly ass Ganju) and Rukia is NOT CONIVING (that's a shock………Scary)

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Chapter 1: My Life

Ichigo's point of view

My names Ichigo Kurousaki, I have vibrant orange hair, and tall slender form with some muscle mass I guess. I am fifteen years old…….. So I'm a high school student, the only thing that is weird about me is that I can see spirits. I don't know I guess I've always seen them ever since I was a child…… that's just me. I don't really feel like talking sooooo ima go to sleep. (Don't ask I just feel like writing it Ichigo to me seems lazy and laid back in the beginning of the series before the hollow thing started and everytime he comes home he is usually in his room staring in space or reading a book.)

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A/N: Remember Ichigo is OC so dreams about girls …….. perverts are funny hehehehe………. Its true especially in animes example ………… yall lucky I cant think of one. Anyway to ichigo's dream sequence

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ICHIGOS DREAM SEQUENCE

'Squishy, squishy, squishy all day girls are great SO SOFT AND SQUISHYFUL I don't know' "Mahhh Oni chan stop playing with us" "heheh never my little pets ima play with you and do things you'll never want me to stop doing for instants…………." whispering something in one of the three sexii (not describing them) girl's ear around him. In reply there was a deep blushy on her face. Then he started to laugh perversely (Shan-chan dats me: spine chilling and skin crawl) Then he heard something ……………………..' ……..D MORNING ICHIGO!

Instantly his eyes opened and he jumped out of his bed successfully not getting hurt bye his dads attacking feet and kicking him in the face at the same time. " DANM IT DAD WHAT THE HELL IS FUCKING WRONG WITH YOU EVRY FUCKING MORNING I WAKE UP TO YOUR UGLY MUG TRYING TO STOP THE SHIT OUT OF MY FACE……….. DANM IT MAN I WAS HAVING A GREAT DREAM ABOUT VERLOMPTIOUS, LUSCIOUS GIR…….." stopping his rant as soon as he saw the look on his dads face.

"ICHIGO MY SON DON'T BE ASHAMED TO SAY IT YOU ARE FINALLY TURNING INTO A YOUNG MAN OF WANTS AND NEED, LUSTING AFTER GIRLS IS NATURAL (putting arm on ichigo's shoulder and saying in a low voice) I was starting to think you were gay until I found you were a closet pervert hehehehehe……….. pssssst by the way I have condoms in the …………." He stop right there by a sudden outburst.

"Oh HELL NO dad I don't appreciate you talking like that in front of you almost ten year old daughters !" yelled a embarrassed Karin " You stupid dick head poor excuse for a father." "Karin chan, Yuzu chan I am so sorry I've been neglecting you two bury your sorrows into your fathers strong chest." ripping his shirt open moving towards his daughters. Karin just kicked him in the face and dragged him out the room not before stopping in front the door and saying "You can quit the horrified look ichi ni" sticks her tongue and closes the door.

For another 2 min's he stood there with that exact look and finally stopped being a statue picked out his clothes went to the bathroom and do his morning routine and get ready to leave for school. He went down stairs and got some toast. Exiting the house/clinic his dad gave him the thumbs up and ichigo sported the WTF look and then Kami sama save my Japanese ass, then leaves the house. He was running alittle late so he decided to run some of the way to his high school when he turned a corner he bumbed into something or some one. "HEY WHAT THE FUCK……" then stopped when he saw who it was he was screaming at.

To be continued

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A/N: I know I did not start it how it started in the anime but I'll progress towards it so rukia can actually be involved in the story. So the scene where he fights those dudes because they spilled over the girls flowers so it'll be next chapter. Ja ne

Ill try to update this story and ima do a cliffhanger in each one Mwahahahahahahahahaha hehehe don't mind the mild show case of mild retartedness. Okay now seriously Bye


	2. My life part 2

If dis doesn't come out don't mind it just read if you see this and don't know what im talking bout forget it! XD

Hey those whom actually read this fanfiction im sorry for not updating in like fuve frinkin months but I had writers block on how to flow into the second chapter hehehe sorry bout dat but ill try to update more often and try to make this my longests story since the plot is thicker then my others

Disclaimer I do not own Bleach Tite Kubo Does

Chapter 2

My Life: Part 2

Previously:

"_Hey what the fuck….." He screamed out but stop when sees who it was._

Story time:

Instantly he stopped his rambling because in front of him was the front view of lacey pink underwear. He then started to blush the owner of those panties was no other them the sexii Orihime Chan and she was blushing hard also. After a while she screamed and closed her legs that were spread apart very widely. He got up and offered her a hand but she refused to take it instead she got up, just glared at him, shouted " Hentai", stomped on his foot, and marched off the her school which coincidentally was his school and even more coincidentally was in the same class as him. Inoue Orihime: Known as the knock out beauty of their school her breast where the size of watermelons and for a strange reason Kurosaki always felt some strange spiritual energy surround her. "Ouch…… that hurt" he exclaimed grabbing his foot. "What the hell she did dat for it was an accident sheeeesh not like I looked at her underwear on purpose or sumtin" pouted an agitated ichigo. "Well it can't be helped ………….. Guess I should hurry before I'm really late for school" with that said he walked off the rest of the way to school.

Karakura High

"Goood mooorrrnnnniiinnnggg ICHHHIIIGGGOOOO" whaled kiego one of ichigos close friends along with fellow pervert (I know its funny because ichigo puts on a aloof façade around his school friends but in this story he is best friends/perverts with them especially kiego XD) instead of greeting him kindly he instead backhanded him in the face showing he wasn't in the mood. "maahhhhh ichigo you know that wasn't nice …. Whats up with you man your more quiet then usual" wined kiego. Mizuiro and chad were also there and was also wonderin what was going on with the pervert. Ichigo just stared at orihimes back it was lunch time and she was eating her weird concoctions as usual and he was wondering how she stays so smexxii with all dat food consumption. 'you could tell she can give a top notch blow job' he felt his self get a little hard because of his horny thoughts. "Ooooohhh I see your staring at the fine Orihime chan I could tell you dig her its like written all over yer face ……….. ichigo and hime sintin in a tree k.i.s-…" ichigo didn't say a word he just gave him that 'what are you talking bout fuck off man' look and backhanded him again. "im soo apaaullled yoou looser hooww coooulld yoooou dooo thhhaaattt to yooour clooosest I repaaett cloooseeesstt frriiieeennndd ….. maybe I should give you my anti keigo club head band then you could ahhhhh…." Said Keigo whom had a headband that ichigo snipped with a mysterious pop out o no where scissors then he ran. "Fine suit your self come on mizuiro lets blow dis popsicle stand we're surrounded by loooosssseeerrss." "What ever you say Asano san" replied mizuiro. "Ahhhhhhhhh stop with the formalities you don't talk to ichigo like dat" replied a pissed kiego walking away from Ichigo and Chad. "ICHIGO HE CALLED US LOOSERS …..WHAT DO WE DO" said chad in a deep voice. "I don't care" "OHHH OKAY" and sat down to eat his lunch. Meanwhile ichigo was still staring at orihime when she turned around and saw him staring at her. '_why is he staring aty me' _thought inoue orihime she turned red when his gaze intensified. She always liked ichigo but could never tell him but then he did something perverted to her looked up her skirt. With that thought she gave him a heated glare in which he blew off. _'The nerve'_. What the hell what is her problem goooshh it was an accident for crying out loud. Thought a fustrated ichigo. He was having a lloooooonnngggg day.

After school

"Yo" said his child hood friend Tatsuki "did you do something to orihime chan she seems kind of tense evertime you look her way………….U DIDN'T DO ANYTHING PERVERSE DID YOU CAUSE IF YOU DID IMA KNOCK YER LIGHTS OUT" "CHILL TATSUKI WHATS WRONG WITH YOU DON'T WORRY I JUST BUMPED INTO HER AND WE ENDED UP IN A WEIRD POSITION" replied an annoyed ichigo "OHHH OKAY I'll tell hime it was an accident" suggested tatsuki as she walked away.

He was almost home when three skaters bumped him and kept on going then he heard a crash and the sound of crying then he saw a floating little girl. "Hey kid whats wrong?" "those boys knocked down the floors my mommy left for me" "okay ill handle it for you hold up hid" then he approached the rambunctious teens to give them a piece of his mind


End file.
